18th century Imaginary Pamphlet Content


THE New Holy Thursday

The Holy Thursday hath been called upon, as that Very day shall commence the welcoming: baptizing 2000 orphan children that used to tarry midst the Rues of London. To this day, ye Priesthood and the wax of these children wilt put to start a revolutionary inauguration of the Holy Thursday.

On the Holy Week, We beseech all thou loved Lambs from areas widely known and Unknown to be a fere and become proby to our future’s folctoga and whence you shall successfully be fullsome of pride and bequest the philanthropic culture. Undoubtedly, this year’s commencement of the Holy Thursday shall be amongst the most important reminiscences of history of St Paul’s cathedral.

 The events held shall be in the order of:

The welcoming of the Pope

The welcoming of the House of Stuart

The welcoming of the House of Hanover

The Mass – Hymns of Convivial

The commencement of the baptism (Ceremony)

The Great Feast

Thanksgiving– Hymns of the Holy Thursday  

This day shall be extraordinary and is wrought upon us by the institutions’ collaborated and concerned thoughts of the society.


The Welcoming


Thanking thee, your honored and majestic British Monarch, members of thy house of Stuart and Hanover, shall be amidst us. Children from all the schools nearing London shall accompany thou to make them their own and this shall be a prodigious redolent mélange to aid the children to feel amongst us. The Exclusive New Hymns of Convivial shall be one to look forward to.


The Baptism of two thousand children by the Cardinals, invited from all over England.


The Great Feast

The Great Feast shall welcome the entrance for this great rue of content and express devotees to mingle amidst new Lambs. Melodious music accompanied by a special ceremony for the new orphanage home to be located nears the cathedral.

With Thine Your Majestic Monarchs gratitude, help for the poor, underprivileged shall gain educational facilities shall help to raise funds for the schooling during the Great Feast.


Hymns of Convivial:

Heavenly Angels

After what hath been draught upon us,

Let the sins be rinsed of ye skin

Solemnly, shall rites remain amidst

Let it be the child’s; let it be their day.


Angels, o heavenly creatures,

We await, for these soon to be lambs

Rejoice amongst us; deliver us from fear

Let hope fill up to seek our new proby.


Thy love has revoked us from misery

Shall turn every poison to remedy

Wilt we know thou presence

Let us serve thee, become your devotee.


Our foe shall be forgiven; our wrath shall be forgotten

For his acceptance, his angels by our sides

Henceforth, truth and joy shall be amidst

Nary shall cometh our way to seek blessedness.


The Early Hour

T’was on that blesseth night

The fires of rage and silence ignite

T’was two of the fierce solitary insight

For the angels abide the forest of blight


For what hath thy lambs done to thee

Our lord finally answered to plea

Bequest the coming, Beseech, humble thee

Hearts, thou hunger shall vanquish like thunder.



Thou Opinions from thou own:

The Church has been ever so philanthropic about promoting adoption from these wonderfully picked children and shall be benefitted by thy gratuitous contribution to this noble and healthy cause.

– Madame de Pompadour


What thy conquerth, what thy eat is the sole destiny written by the hands of The Almighty himself. Its time one shall contribute to thy Church.

-Antonio Salieri


“To see a World in a Grain of Sand 
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour.” 

-William Blake


The Institutions, thus seek to reduce Slavery and Colorist mentalities and this shall be the correct opportunity to rinse thy sins. It will be an honor.

– Thomas Clarkson

“One day Angels hath said to me that a fere will bequeath us to wax a proby of thy God and free us from our pudh curse. Holy Thursday wilt be that day”

Tom Darce


“The day of the Lord, the Holy Thursday shall henceforth hath one to be celebrated at St Paul’s, a day to be reminisced for thy heaven-sent children shall enter our midst, wrought the real Lambs of God.

-The Pope


It shall be a day to see. The most waited time of the year to be rejoiced more with the receiving of children that need to be folctoga for our tomorrow.

-Cardinal of St Paul


St Paul’s dost to connect naught but seek fullsome equality and encourage philanthropy to release their sins by returning the goodness to the society. Every churchgoer is to visit the church where they canst welcome the Pope

Lady Elizabeth Berkeley

Archaic Terms used

Bequeath to give or leave by will, to hand down

Beseech – request, ask.

Cometh – comes, or coming.

Bequest: a legacy

Dost – do, does.

Draught – the act of pulling

Fere – friend, companion.

Folc-toga: A popular leader of the people

Fullsome – rich, plentiful.

Hath – has.

Henceforth – from now on

Midst – Middle, among

Nary – None

Naught – Nothing

Proby – Apprentice.

Pudh – horrible.

Shall – will

Seek – To go in search or quest of

Tarry – to linger

Thou – you

Thee – you

Thine – your

Thy – your

Whence – From where

Wax – to grow, to become.

Wilt –will

Wrought – done, made, created

Ye – thou in honorifics

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